From 2008 to now, the divorce rate in Canada has been increasing; it can be compared with bargaining in auctions which rises and rises and never falls off. According to statistical analysis, we found around 40% of married couples are more likely to get divorced before their silver jubilee wedding anniversary.
A divorce story is never pleasant but better than hanging in a relationship without any love. The reasons for getting a divorce can start from a small issue and can end in a heart-breaking situation. Let us discuss the increasing rate and its reason especially in today’s generation-
Increasing Divorce Rates in Canada
Results of divorce
As per a renowned divorce lawyer, Louis K., not every divorce story needs to be a sad ending. It is a matter of growth and not making the same mistake all over again.
Divorce doesn’t imply the end of your love life. After a divorce, take time, heal yourself, improve your mental health, and do something good for others that make you feel good. It is a new chapter of your life, so use it as a second chance to begin again.
There could be whispering and backbiting; but remember, nobody will understand what you were going through and only your conscience has the permission to judge your action.
After a court separation, female partners often get alimony. A regular sum of money given by the male to female every month to live her life, and if children are involved, for their upbringing, it is asked and paid. But sometimes, the process gets corrupted, and the innocent male has to pay alimony for the rest of their lives.
For a newly divorced couple, no-parenting could be a nightmare. Recently they may get a divorce, and before a reasonable time, they need to share the custody of their child. There hundreds of guidelines and coaching courses for handling co-parenting successfully. Go join and help your partners because you children’s mental development and upbringing are at stake.
Mental Development of your child
Broken family children often suffer from depression which ends n dropping off of study, drug addiction, and even suicide in extreme cases. So, you need to be serious about what you are exposing to your kids about your relationship.
You might have a traumatic experience, but there is no reason that your child needs to go through that too. At a reasonable age, if it is necessary, share with them but keep an eye on their change of behaviour.
It is very common for suffering PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder). For that trauma, divorcees are afraid of loving and getting married again. And the children who had witnessed it can also be in fear of commitment which quite often leads to life in relationships. And there is the loss of anger control, depression, acting out in front of others are very common.
So, a new chapter can be opened, but you need to take care of yourself and your children (if children involved) to need a happier life. Choice and control both are in your hands.
Reasons for Divorce
Money Feud and insecurities
It could be surprising, but in Canada, according to the Bank of Montreal, up to 68% divorce happens for money. With the time being, when the family gets bigger and expenses like food, clothing, house, health care, etc. come in the way, the feud over money often occurs.
Then the insecurities in a relationship grow stronger than the love that bonded him in the wedding vow. Besides arguing and not tolerating each other’s company is very common.
The second important cause of break up is infidelity. It can happen from both of the sides. It can be caused by previous anger, insecurities, resentment, not being attracted to each other, different sexual appetite, etc.
Sometimes, the spouse cannot leave the other for the sake of their children. But there is no advantage in hanging in a loveless marriage. In the long run, it ruins the mental power of the whole family.
Falling out of love
It is very common in married life that the partners are no longer attracted to each other. It is said that opposite tracks attract each other. But when the honeymoon phase is gone, couples may find out the other- irresponsible and cannot respect and value each other’s opinions.
It could be other problems such as workaholic routines, maintaining a joint family or children, multi-tasking at home and works, budget problems, etc. When these reasons come forward, we find out that the couples forget to give time to their relationships and drown in their responsibilities. In these cases, the divorce could be mutual, but the scar is permanent.
In Canada, every year, almost 40,000 cases of domestic violence are reported. In this modern era, it is minimal but not uncommon, almost in every country. We can take note from celebrities such as Johnny Depp and Amber Heard that both of the sexes can be abusive.
The reason behind it could be the sick mentality of the significant others, alcohol and drug addiction, infidelity, insecurities, unhealthy doubting mind, money, etc. In the case of domestic violence, there should be zero tolerance shown by society and court. Remember hiding your beating marks is not a solution to stop falling apart your wedding because extreme results could cost your life.
Sometimes the court orders to take a couple of therapy or to spend some time together away from work and responsibilities. Find out what made you fall in love in the first place if it works out then congratulations! But if it doesn’t work out, contact a family lawyer to know about your next step, rights, child custody, etc.
Whatever the reason behind your divorce, don’t dishearten yourself. After getting rid of the situation, don’t bother what other people have to say and work on your positive energy and if necessary, go for a therapy.